Backyard Grotto

As soon as I got the backyard of our house in Hawaii cleared of brush and other objects, I took an older crucifix and placed it against a large rock. This crucifix will be there until our statue of St. Theresa of Liseaux arrives, and is placed in this grotto. Karol has a deep devotion to "The Little Flower" as St. Theresa is known. The nearby parish to which we belong in Mountain View is also named after St. Theresa!

New Haircut

As hot as it gets in KC, I need to keep my hair short and cool!

Crisis Intervention Training

This past Wednesday, I spent an hour at the County Jail talking about the importance of Crisis Intervention Training (CIT). I was part of the "family panel" with Larry Aron (facing the camera in the picture) as we gave personal testimony about mental illness.
If the policemen who came to my house on November 11, 2002 had received CIT, I firmly believe that my son, Aaron, would not have been shot and killed that day. I'll talk 'till the cows come home anytime anywhere about the value of CIT.

Taking Shape

Things are starting take shape at DeLaSalle with a new roof, and a new sign announcing the new charter!

Ominous Clouds, Thunder, Sirens (and Mercy)

I returned to work in my downtown Kansas City office on Friday, August 20, and spent most of the day ensconced in my office that has no windows. Around 2:30 pm, I thought I'd step outside for a minute and see what was happening.
I was surprised to see dark clouds and to hear the rumbling of thunder, accompanied by a wailing siren. I have been used to foreboding clouds in Hilo but not thunder and certainly not a possible tornado!
Whenever things look this ominous, I'm reminded of the times in which we live and God's justice.

The Four Angels of Holy Rosary Church in Ke'eau

They are each unique, with individual expressions and postures.
These four angels are positioned at four pivotal stations within the small Catholic church in Ke'eau, about 8 miles down the mountain from our house.
The two angels holding the sanctuary candles (top two pictures) are at either side of the front of the church, facing the altar and tabernacle.
The two angels holding the bowls for holy water (bottom two pictures) are at the back of the church facing one another.
Angels have a special role in our faith as Catholics and Christians.
They were created by God for specific purposes and functions, and have characteristics associated with one of the nine different "choirs" to which all angels belong.
These choirs, in descending order of rank, are as follows: Seraphim, Cherubim, Thrones, Dominions, Virtues, Powers, Principalities, Archangels and Angels.
It is only my guess, but I think these angels are of the Cherubim rank, as it would be their duty to be celestial attendants and to praise God.
All of us have a Guardian Angel, whose rank is that of angel. Their role is to deliver prayers to God, and God's answers and blessings to us, as well as to care for us.
May your angel guard and protect you all the days of your life!

Chores

One of the chores I had to do before leaving was to help Karol with her garden and plants.
It was pretty mundane, but I really enjoy working outside for a change.
I will return to Kansas City soon and go back to desk work, so I need to soak up as much outside energy as I can!
I was pretty worn out after kayaking and gardening, but I knew that last night was a special night.
It was one of the key nights of the annual meteor shower know as the Perseid, peaking every year between August 9 to 14. Because this annual "shower" occurs around the August 10 feast of St. Lawrence, a early Church deacon martyred for his faith (roasted over an open fire on a spit), it is sometimes referred to as "the tears of St. Lawrence".
It is so rainy and cloudy up here on the mountain, though, that I thought I had little chance of viewing it.
Before I went to bed, I did see Venus, Mars and Saturn arrayed around the crescent moon, but the rest of the sky here was clouded over.
I looked out my window at midnight, and there were no stars.
But at 3:30 am, I could see that stars were filling the part of the sky visible from my window.
In spite of the lure of my warm bed, I went outside and it was remarkable: every inch of the sky was full of stars! I saw the Milky Way and Venus was now directly overhead. I watched as several meteors streaked though the southern sky!
It was cold, perhaps in the upper-fifties, so I went back inside to put on my sweatshirt and windbreaker and spent the next thirty minutes watching the sky in awe. I was filled with wonder, thrilled with the enormity of God's creation.
I recalled the words that God spoke to Abraham, when He called him out at night and made His covenant with him, promising Abraham that his descendants would be more numerous than the stars that filled the sky that long-ago night.
Last night, I felt God's promise to me reverberate deep within me. I had a locution more than 32 years ago that God would be with me in my suffering. I felt Him say to me that long-ago night: "I will take care of you." He has, and He continues to care for me, and console me, so much. I know and believe that God is faithful! But with my depression and failures, I do not always feel that way.
I am certainly not worthy of God's promises or gifts, yet He gives them.
I have been so blessed, and so touched by the miracles of creation, by the depths and power of the sea, to the enormity of the solar system and stars, to the fires and heat of volcanoes and magma.
How can I keep from believing in You, my Lord and my God?!

Hilo Bay

I decided yesterday to do one of the personal things I had kept putting off.
With Karol's concurrence, I drove down to Hilo and rented a kayak for the morning.
There was no rain and only a very light wind on a sunny day, and I easily made it to the tsunami wall in the bay. (The wall appears as a low shadow in the distance in the first picture, well beyond the small sailboat.) The swells out beyond the wall frightened me, so I headed back in to shore. The ride in was rougher than going out, as it seemed I was fighting the tide.
Back on shore, I got my breviary from the car and prayed Morning Prayer, praising God for the majesty of His creation.
I saw Mauna Kea in the distance (see the second picture, with the kayak in the foreground), the highest mountain in Hawaii.
I was tired and had plenty of chores to do back at the house, so I strapped the kayak back to my car and returned to the rental agency.
When I got back to the rental location, I had a nice visit with the owner of the business. Turns out that he is a neighbor of mine, and operates a hostel just a mile from our house here on the mountain. He was a rough Texan, interspersing curse words throughout his conversation, telling me how he had managed to thrive on the Big Island, where it can be pretty tough. When he showed me a picture of his arrival in Hawaii 35 years ago on a sailboat he had built and with his two lovely children posing with him, I asked what the kids were doing now. His gruff exterior instantly changed, when he informed me that his son had died 10 years ago in a motorcycle accident. I told him I lost a child as well, and he shared something I hear a lot, but now question, regarding how you never expect to lose a child. I think that is a parent's worst fear, and it was always at the back of my mind. Before Aaron died, I hoped it would never happen, as I hope now that it does not recur with our other three children. But it can be a violent world, and I hope and pray for the continued grace of life for our family and for all.

Transfiguration!

What a bittersweet feast!
On August 6, Catholics celebrate the magnificent feast of the Transfiguration of Jesus on Mount Tabor.
Jesus gave James, John and Peter a sense of His majesty and glory when He was suddenly transfigured before their eyes, and was seen speaking with Moses and Elijah.
On August 6, 2002, I hospitalized my son, Aaron, against his will, calling the police to our house to break into his room and take him forcibly to Western Missouri Mental Health Center. I hoped that he would be transformed by this experience, and for a while, he was. He began taking his medicine again, went to therapy regularly, even twice weekly for a month, and enrolled in vocational rehabilitation.
But a little over three months later, on November 11, 2002, he had stopped his meds and therapy, and had seemingly lost hope again. This time, he called the police to our house. I later learned that one of the two policemen who had responded to our call on August 6 was one of the six policemen at our house on November 11. Before he entered our house, he had told another policeman, the commanding officer on the scene, that he had been there before, and that our son was ill. Nonetheless, on that later occasion, the commanding officer opened fire inside our house, shooting Aaron five times, while another policeman responded with three gunshots.
That same afternoon, Karol saw Aaron in the arms of Jesus, transformed!
On August 6, 1945, the US dropped the first atomic bomb on a public site, the city of Hiroshima.
On another August 6, in 1978, Pope Paul VI died, passing into glory. I loved Pope Paul VI because of his courageous stand on human life, when he gave us his striking encyclical, Humane Vitae, in 1968.
I pray and believe that Jesus calls us all to transfiguration, and that this feast today is a call to glory, like that of the rainbow early this morning as the sun was just rising here in Mountain View!

St. Theresa Church

My Hawaii parish church is St. Theresa Church in Mountain View. It is located along Volcano Road, or Highway 19, near the fifteen-mile-marker. Coincidentally, it is also located at an altitude of just over fifteen hundred feet.
The first time I visited St. Theresa Church was five years ago. As we were driving up the mountain to house-sit near Volcano National Park, I was drawn to the small, quaint church structure with a sign proclaiming perpetual adoration. I thought to myself that such devotion to Our Lord in the remote setting might have some future meaning to my life. And indeed, it has.
I try to attend daily Mass at St. Theresa as often as possible. There is a reverent atmosphere in the church and among the people who worship there. I feel drawn to worship there because it is quiet and I find it easy to open myself in prayer so that I can "hear" God, and communicate with God.
After Mass on Tuesday, I talked with parishioner Gavin Kaisen. He told me that he converted from the Tenrikyo religion to Catholicism five years ago. He said that his wife had invited him to attend Perpetual Adoration, and that he was drawn by Our Lord's presence to open himself to join the Church.
I was struck by Gavin's intense commitment to his new faith. I was touched that he would share his conversion account with me.
He further told me that the parish no longer has Perpetual Adoration. But they do have two holy hours each week, one at their mission church, Holy Rosary in Keeau, and one, of course, at St. Theresa's.
On Wednesday, I attended the holy hour after Mass, where Fr. Sal blessed us with Our Lord's presence in the monstrance (see picture). Fr. Sal is a very prayerful and thoughtful priest.

Today

Today was another beautiful day in Hilo.
It rained fairly continuously in Mountain View, where we live.
It was also the first day of school in Hawaii.
Imagine that...the first day of school is August 2. That's pretty early.
My son, Aaron, would have turned 34 today.
It's the feast of St. Eusebius of Vercelli, a fourth century bishop.
I was surprised to learn of another saint whose feast day is today: St. Peter Julian Eymard.
St. Peter Julian was the founder of the Congregation of the Blessed Sacrament, the priests (and brother) who serve at St. Joseph Church in downtown Hilo, where I went to Mass today.
I met Fathers Sam Loterte and Greg de Guzman last week when my friend, Fr. Carlos Saligumba, visited me. I learned that the Congregation of the Blessed Sacrament is composed of priests, brothers, and sisters. Interestingly, St. Peter intended to include laity and deacons in their order, like the composition in the Society of Our Lady of the Most Holy Trinity (SOLT), the order with which I am involved. Small world!

Choir Director, "Aunty" Juanita Ramirez

She's got a sweet voice and the singing passion of a woman a quarter of her age, and I love her arrangements at Sunday Mass for St. Theresa Church in Mountain View, Hawaii.
It's a small church, uniquely suited for a woman who I suspect sang professionally at some point in her life. She has a theatrical bent as well, smiling beatifically when all eyes are on her.
I saw a different side of her yesterday when a memorial Mass was celebrated for her late son, Ernest Ramirez, who died on July 3 in Honolulu.
Aunty led the singing at this Mass, just like she does every week. I admired how she kept her composure until the very end, when she asked us to sit down while she sang "her gift to Ernest", who died at the age of 58.
It wasn't the best sung Ave Maria I ever heard, but it was the most deeply felt, a mother singing at the loss of her son, in the words of the hymn that asks for the Blessed Mother's intercession.
I have found my adjustment to yet another new parish and church in my life to be full of pleasant surprises, like Aunty Juanita. The parishioners at St. Theresa are no different than Catholics in most other parishes, except for what I would term their "local color". Like Aunty, the church has several unique personages, like the two ukulele playing choir members and the Eastern monk in full robe and head-covering (with a pony tail holding together his longish graying hair!). They have three churches at various locations along the highway that leads to Kilauea Volcano. Father hears confessions frequently, which is a wonderful opportunity for sinners like me! There are two holy hours with solemn Benediction each week.
When I first visited my son on the Big Island five years ago, he helped us lodge in a friend's house who was out of town, in the town called Volcano. St. Theresa's was the closest church, and I was immediately drawn to the reverent attitude within the church and liturgies. I saw it as the type of parish I would like to join should we ever move to the Big Island, and now we are members of this vibrant community. I am very pleased, as is Karol.
I hope one day soon to be more active in this parish, when I can spend more time on the island. But for now, I'm on "visitor" status until my work and studies for the diaconate are complete in KC.